On the front page of today’s newspaper (The News & Observer) is a sweet photograph of my two children snuggling together, as they do so often. The article is entitled, “The Road To Foreign Adoption Grows Longer and Bumpier”. The piece is reported by Kristin Collins, a writer for the News & Observer with whom I spoke and met with throughout the course of her writing this piece.
My not-so-subtle goal was to encourage her to show the other side of adoption story – the fact that yes, international adoption can be an arduous process. It can also be relatively seamless. Our adoption of Caleb from Ethiopia a few years ago was a 5-month process from end to end. Our second adoption (for our third child) has been taking longer.
There are so many factors to consider when adopting a child, whether domestically or internationally. I guess I would always hope that people think about the actual children who are waiting, as opposed to the admittedly frustrating bureaucratic red tape that can hamper a lot of these experiences.
We’ve had several stories written about our experience with adoption, and I find it fascinating to follow the trends in media when covering the topic. I guess what I came away from this interview experience was this:
Sometimes you just have to balance out the sad and ugly parts of reality with the unembellished truth – and if you ever get a chance to mix in the optimism and the hope of what has occured in your own experience, what may not be recognized as occuring now and what can absolutely be again … maybe that is at least one step closer to more comprehensive reporting on any major issue such as this.
You’re welcome to click here to read the piece in its entirety.
Some frames of the article…
And here are just a handful of the sweet photographs I took in and around Ethiopia when we stayed at the orphanage in Addis Ababa, an experience that we will always hold dear to our hearts. Most of these children were waiting for homes and a family:
My sweet husband and son bonded nearly immediately. I credit our ability to connect with our son so quickly to the enormous affection showered upon the children by the nannies and staff of the orphanage.
They don’t have a lot to offer these orphans in terms of material goods or even basic necessities, at times – but the genuine emotion they feel for these children sets them up for an enormous capacity to love and connect with their new families.
At the airport, documented & ready to go – and me holding Caleb, leaving the airport at midnight on New Year’s Eve (we celebrated the stroke of midnight several times as we flew over several times zones š I remember this moment – I was exhausted, hungry, in need of a shower, very in need of seeing my daughter … and immensely relieved to be bringing our baby home.
I didn’t even know at that moment how much I would grow to love my son. So that’s what’s hard to describe – the enormous gap between children needing a home and parents who couldn’t even fathom the power of how much love they could feel for this “foreign” child, often halfway around the world. But that’s logistics.
Sure, logistics can get complicated. But they’re certainly far from impossible.
And isn’t that what we teach our kids anyway … that love is always possible???
okay, Tamara. I swear, every time I read your blog, I write something about getting goosebumps. But this time takes the cake! What an incredible story. I didn’t realize you were looking to adopt again. That kid would be so lucky to get you guys for parents. The pictures you took make me want to adopt 10 kids! Thank you for making a difference in the lives of these children…and in our future.
okay, Tamara. I swear, every time I read your blog, I write something about getting goosebumps. But this time takes the cake! What an incredible story. I didn’t realize you were looking to adopt again. That kid would be so lucky to get you guys for parents. The pictures you took make me want to adopt 10 kids! Thank you for making a difference in the lives of these children…and in our future.
This is beautiful!
This is beautiful!
I just got teary eyed reading this entry. My husband and I have thought about adoption and so many people tell us that it’s not wort the "hassle". All I see are children that need homes and I don’t understand why people just see the paperwork.
You and your husband are truly and inspiration. We honestly need more people like you.
I just got teary eyed reading this entry. My husband and I have thought about adoption and so many people tell us that it’s not wort the "hassle". All I see are children that need homes and I don’t understand why people just see the paperwork.
You and your husband are truly and inspiration. We honestly need more people like you.
Wow! I realize we don’t keep in touch as much as I would like,but I believe if you keep the faith it comes back tri-fold. My thoughts and prayers are with my entire family 24/7. Believe and anything is possible. Please keep this blog going so I can keep tabs on you all! Love, peace, joy and happiness. Sister
Wow! I realize we don’t keep in touch as much as I would like,but I believe if you keep the faith it comes back tri-fold. My thoughts and prayers are with my entire family 24/7. Believe and anything is possible. Please keep this blog going so I can keep tabs on you all! Love, peace, joy and happiness. Sister
There is honestly nothing more life giving than to personally experience your own unlimited capacity to love. And with that comes tremendous reward. I met all of these sweet kids and they are truly remarkable individually. As much as I wish every effort to grow our family was complete in only 5 months, knowing how I feel after Caleb’s 4th birthday, three years after bringing him home, I would willingly wrestle with a process that lasted three years. Thanks for the thoughtful post, Tamara – it warms me and dissolves my anxiety as we take our next steps to growing our family.
There is honestly nothing more life giving than to personally experience your own unlimited capacity to love. And with that comes tremendous reward. I met all of these sweet kids and they are truly remarkable individually. As much as I wish every effort to grow our family was complete in only 5 months, knowing how I feel after Caleb’s 4th birthday, three years after bringing him home, I would willingly wrestle with a process that lasted three years. Thanks for the thoughtful post, Tamara – it warms me and dissolves my anxiety as we take our next steps to growing our family.
Thank you so much for such warm and thoughtful comments, they really are wonderful to hear.
Thank you so much for such warm and thoughtful comments, they really are wonderful to hear.
I have chills all over and tears in my eyes again – how do you bring this out in me almost every day??
I have chills all over and tears in my eyes again – how do you bring this out in me almost every day??
Tamara, you are more than a photographer in my eyes now; you are human with an enormous heart. I am moved by this post because my husband and I have been trying to conceive since our wedding in 2002, but no such luck. After many months/years of infertility treatments (we were told we’re both "just fine"), we are still child-less. The next step is in vitro and that’s completely out of our budget. We’d like to adopt, but hear horror stories about scams all the time so we really don’t know where to start.
Tamara, you are more than a photographer in my eyes now; you are human with an enormous heart. I am moved by this post because my husband and I have been trying to conceive since our wedding in 2002, but no such luck. After many months/years of infertility treatments (we were told we’re both "just fine"), we are still child-less. The next step is in vitro and that’s completely out of our budget. We’d like to adopt, but hear horror stories about scams all the time so we really don’t know where to start.
Hi! I read the article in the N&O, and I thought there is Tamara again. Maya loved seeing Sophie’s pic on the front page…and Caleb’s story is beautiful!
Hi! I read the article in the N&O, and I thought there is Tamara again. Maya loved seeing Sophie’s pic on the front page…and Caleb’s story is beautiful!
This is the first time I’ve seen your blog and this has me hooked already… I didn’t even get past the first post yet! We have two biological children and just adopted our 3rd daughter from Ethiopia in October! I left part of my heart in Ethiopia too- I am constantly amazed at how much joy she has brought into our lives….. so worth the wait and emotional roller coaster of the wait hey?
This is the first time I’ve seen your blog and this has me hooked already… I didn’t even get past the first post yet! We have two biological children and just adopted our 3rd daughter from Ethiopia in October! I left part of my heart in Ethiopia too- I am constantly amazed at how much joy she has brought into our lives….. so worth the wait and emotional roller coaster of the wait hey?
I forgot to mention too that our process was less than 10 months start to finish….. not quite as quick as your Ethiopian adoption but amazing, nonetheless! Good luck with the rest of your process š
I forgot to mention too that our process was less than 10 months start to finish….. not quite as quick as your Ethiopian adoption but amazing, nonetheless! Good luck with the rest of your process š
I’m so glad I stumbled on your blog this week … amazing story and wonderful insight. š
I’m so glad I stumbled on your blog this week … amazing story and wonderful insight. š
What an amzing difference having happy smiling photos of the children makes! I wish every photographer would pledge to travel at some point and volunteer their efforts to take shots like these to send out to adopting parents!
What an amzing difference having happy smiling photos of the children makes! I wish every photographer would pledge to travel at some point and volunteer their efforts to take shots like these to send out to adopting parents!
MsB – I wish you didn’t have to experience all that you have so far – I can tell you that we are very active in the adoption community, and I I think the horror stories float to the top – the vast majority are the opposite of that. Let me know if you ever want to talk….
MsB – I wish you didn’t have to experience all that you have so far – I can tell you that we are very active in the adoption community, and I I think the horror stories float to the top – the vast majority are the opposite of that. Let me know if you ever want to talk….
Congrats, Laurie!! That’s wonderful to hear š
Congrats, Laurie!! That’s wonderful to hear š
Aww, THANK YOU SO MUCH, Tamara! I so appreciate it! I just sent an e-mail to the studio. Thanks again!
Aww, THANK YOU SO MUCH, Tamara! I so appreciate it! I just sent an e-mail to the studio. Thanks again!
beautiful my friend!!! thank you so much for sharing,,,
beautiful my friend!!! thank you so much for sharing,,,
beautiful story, Tamara, thank you for posting and sharing it. I’ll never forget being in Guatemala to visit Joaquin for the first time and seeing Caleb’s photo on the cover of Adoptive Families mag. Remember I emailed you at 3:00am?? Thanks for keeping adoption awareness in the forefront of things. xoxoxo Abigail
beautiful story, Tamara, thank you for posting and sharing it. I’ll never forget being in Guatemala to visit Joaquin for the first time and seeing Caleb’s photo on the cover of Adoptive Families mag. Remember I emailed you at 3:00am?? Thanks for keeping adoption awareness in the forefront of things. xoxoxo Abigail
I didn’t know you were planning another adoption – how wonderful!! Great story and lovely images. Thanks for sharing this touching and tender story.
I didn’t know you were planning another adoption – how wonderful!! Great story and lovely images. Thanks for sharing this touching and tender story.
Just teared up looking at these photos remembering the very moment you left to get sweet Caleb. Looking forward to the next moment when you bring your second daughter HOME from Equador!
Just teared up looking at these photos remembering the very moment you left to get sweet Caleb. Looking forward to the next moment when you bring your second daughter HOME from Equador!
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